Marriage Monday: Solution-Oriented

In the book The Divorce Remedy, marriage therapist Michele Weiner-Davis shares seven steps to saving your marriage.   Today I wanted to share a little part of  Step #2, Know What You Want.

She suggests you list two or three things you are hoping to change or improve about your marriage. Be solution-oriented about goal-setting. Right now. Grab a paper. Write it down.

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Go ahead. 

Here's where I think it gets interesting! Think about what you want in your marriage, not what's missing. The trouble with complaints is that you are focused on the problems in your marriage rather than what you can do about them. She gives these examples:

Instead of thinking:                                   
I dont want to be separated any longer.
Think:
I would like her to be home by May.

Instead of thinking:        
I hate it when he avoids me.  
Think:          
 I'd like him to be in the same room with me after dinner.

Instead of thinking:   
I wish she weren't so negative.
Think:            
It would be nice if she would admit there were a few positive times between us.

Instead of thinking: 
He's so nasty.
Think:                                      
I would like him to compliment me once in a while and let me know he appreciates the things I do for him.

The idea is to talk about the future. Not the past. Translate your complaints into positive goals right now by asking, "when my spouse stops doing __, what will s/he be doing instead?" Now if necessary, rewrite the things you hope to change about your marriage, making sure they are requests for change rather than complaints.

The Divorce Remedy The Proven 7-Step Program for Saving Your Marriage by Michele Weiner-Davis

You can find my other Marriage Monday's here.

Marriage Monday: A Gift From God

"Marriage is a gift from God to us; the quality of our marriage is a gift from us to God." 

-L. Whitney Clayton

You can find my other Marriage Monday's here.

Happy Birthday to me!

Sooo, yesterday was my birthday. 

I'm a lover of all things association so for turning 31 I decided to do a few fun / dorky things. 

• I watched Season 3 episode 1 of Boy Meets World. 
• My morning run was one of my longer ones (I dont go far or fast), a 5k, or 3.1 miles. 
• I read 31 pages in my latest book. Outside in the glorious sun. 
• I took a 31 minute power nap. 

Other notable things that didnt have anything to do with the number.

• Had to renew (and test-since I recently moved to a new state) for a new drivers license.
• Enjoyed an ADORABLE! song/dance show dedicated to me, by my kids.
• Got a surprise group dinner date (ate my favorite, Mexican food!).
• Got a free Froyo (my favorite desert)!

And you know how much I love it when people love my birthday. :) I adored all the phone calls, texts, and emails. And Facebook was awesome, with all my friends giving me shout outs and such. It means the world!

And then there was this too! 

• 13 (yah, see. I just gotta say it. 31 backwards) super cool tweets from super great people!

Lacy Arnold, LeanMoms.com, Fitness

Richelle Mead, Author (Vampire Academy)

Danielle Fishel, Actress, Boy Meets World/ Girl Meets World

Rowan Blanchard, Actress, Girl Meets World

Jim Brickman, Pianist

Sarah Dessen, Author (The Truth About Forever)

Ally Carter, Author (Gallagher series)

Bertie Ranger, The Bertinator, Fitness

Shannon Hale, Author, (Princess Academy, Austenland)

Lori Harder, Busy Girl, Fitness

Holly Black, Author, (Curse Worker series)

Bree Despain, Author, (Dark Divine)

Sara Zarr, Author, (Story of a Girl)

Reading Report 6

What I read from 

March 11 -April 1

Fablehaven by Brandon Mull

 I reread this with my 9 year old. 

A middle-grade/childrens fantasy about Kendra and Seth, learning about the mythical creatures at their grandparents preserve. 

 Pizza, Love and Other Stuff that Made Me Famous by Kathryn Williams

A culinary YA about Sophie, a high school er who's been selected to appear on Teen Test Kitchen (a televised culinary show).

Sorta Like a Rock Star by Matthew Quick

In this YA, Amber has a hard life but is full of hope. To quote goodreads: "With an oddball cast of characters, and a heartwarming, inspiring story, this novel unveils a beautifully beaten-up world of laughs, loyalty, and hard-earned hope."

 The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater

Fantasty, YA, Paranormal, Mystery. All sorts of good stuff combined with the amazing writing of Maggie Stiefvater. I was nervous about picking this one up but I totally loved it!

Trust Me on This by Jennifer Crusie 

Adult Romance, contemporary, full of laughs. Jennifer Crusie is on my top 5 of favorite authors! I'm pretty sure I've read almost all of her dozens of books.  I heard it described as an screwball comedy and it lived up to it.

 One for the Muphys by Lunda Mullaly Hunt 

Carley is placed into a foster home and learns she can open her heart to people who care about her. Middle grade/ YA, contemporary. 

 Up From Orchard Street by Eleanor Widmer

I enjoyed this one quite a bit. I'll quote from goodreads again: "this exhilarating novel centered around a memorable immigrant family brings to vibrant life the soul and spirit of New York’s legendary Lower East Side." Historical fiction maybe?

Dark Memories by Jeffrey S. Savage

Mystery. A police chief in a small town tries to figure out what happened in the past that is creating new drama and deaths in town again. 

Achieve something great in April!

I've been trying a few different things to hit my target weight and ran across this fun idea. I'm hoping it'll give me that final push I need (with your help!!). 

Anyone interested? It starts April 1st. The more folks we have the bigger than pot. 

Join with me! We'll have lots of fun! :)   

(click the link above to get more info and sign up!)

Also feel free to invite your friends. I'm really excited about this!

I'm also setting up a facebook group so let me know if you want in just to get motivated.

When TV celebrities tweet me

I have a good handful of posts on my blog about a little love I have with Boy Meets World (like here and here and the others here).

So naturally when word spread that the spin off show Girl Meets World was coming out I started gathering all the news from news sites and following the cast on twitter. The beauty of this day and age though is fan mail is a little bit easier to get to your favorite (tweeting) celebrity.

Girl Meets World started filming their pilot last week so of course the cast was all a buzz with pictures and tweets from the set. I tweeted Teo (who plays the older brother to Riley-the girl from the title and Topanga and Cory's son) today asking him what his favorite part was about working with Ben Savage and Danielle Fishel and HOLY COW Danielle & Teo both started talking to me!! Fan girl melt down. I have a major girl crush on the lovely Danielle. And can't wait to see what Teo and Rowan have in store for us. Here's a bit of my days excitement yesterday:

 And here's the picture they were chatting about. :)

Teo's picture from Instagram

Rowan tweeted this one of Rider Strong, Sabrina Carpenter, herself (Rowan Blanchard), and Will Friedle. 

Here's a fun article on yahoo that includes most of the pictures I've seen from the cast. Includes a few set shots and a handful of the current and old cast.

When Authors Tweet Me :)

Social media sure is great. Last night a few friends and I were discussing the awesomeness of one of our favorite authors on Twitter. The subject got brought up that we all had friends with conservative reading habits and so when we suggest a book we might warn of language or a particular scene.  AND GUESS WHAT!!! He totally joined in on the conversation!!!! Yes MARKUS ZUSAK, author of The Book Thief, and my favorite, I am the Messenger. YOU GUYS this made my day!

I first read his books when he came to Utah for a signing (almost two years ago). I've been a fan since!

Then, a few hours later GUESS WHAT!!! I got another tweet from the lovely Morgan Matson (Amy & Roger's Epic Detour)! Grated it was about our choices for delicious snacks on our Monday night movies but still! I love getting the chance to hear about the normal lives of some great people, and sometimes, if you're lucky, hear back from them!